In a groundbreaking move, HITS has announced the replacement of its entire editorial staff with advanced artificial intelligence, a decision aimed at significantly reducing overhead costs while enhancing the accuracy of content.

The transition to AI is expected to minimize the errors, pompous bloviating and dreadful puns that have plagued the site and magazine in the past. Publicists looking for coverage are now required to submit their requests in the form of a ChatGPT query, streamlining the process and ensuring consistent and high-quality responses.

The plan to replace HITS staff with AI has been in development for some time. It was finally deemed ready for deployment when the software successfully formulated a joke about Tom Poleman.