PARADIGM'S EIGHT (PLUS TWO)

Paradigm has upped eight staffers to agent status, and eight is enough.

Let’s learn their names, shall we? NYC sees newly anointed Zac Bluestone and Madi Daigle; L.A. welcomes freshly promoted Brewster Lee; Nashville says howdy to Kylie Doyle, Zach Hartley and Jeremy Shpizner; and each coast has a brand-spankin’-new tour marketing agent: Dani Barrett in L.A. and Andrew Whitaker in NYC.

“Paradigm is a place where people can grow, develop their passions and make incredible things happen for our clients,” declared agency Chairman/CEO Sam Gores. “It's a pleasure to welcome this new group to our agent team, and we look forward to seeing them thrive. I promise I’ll feed them and love them and walk them every day. Please, can I keep them? Please?”

Also joining the agency is veteran music man Phil Egenthal, who brings with him an overwhelming funk. Oh, sorry, we read that wrong: He brings a number of funk-music greats, notably The Revivalists, George Porter Jr., Dumpstaphunk and Foundations of Funk. Naturally, Egenthal is based in the very heart of funky-ass music: Boulder, Colorado.

“Phil is a great agent and a terrific addition to our organization, and we’re looking forward to his many contributions,” noted Paradigm music exec Marty Diamond. “And he has promised to give the drummer some.”

Additionally, as previously announced, Lenore Kinder comes aboard the agency’s Nashville office as an agent. The 10-year AEG Presents veteran earned the Rising Star at this year's Pollstar Awards and Promoter of the Year at last year's ACM Awards.

Now all the new agents begin their orientation process, which includes rigorous instruction in how to order a cobb salad and how to throw your phone at an assistant without injuring your rotator cuff.