Columbia's Harry Styles asks manager Jeffrey Azoff and mega-mogul Irving Azoff how they'll be atoning during this most solemn of holidays. "I've streamlined the process," Swirv replied. "I just put all my sins in a smoothie and drink it while I jog. It's not exactly a fast, but it's gluten-free." Later, 8,531 One Direction fans tore off iHeart CFO/Prexy Rich Bressler's blazer. Seen thinking we're atone-deaf are (l-r) Bressler, Jeffrey, Harry, iHeart CEO Bob Pittman and Swirv.

During this extra-glam photo op, iHeart's Marissa Morris wondered aloud if fasting to atone for your sins included tequila. Seen hoping to be written in the big book are (l-r) Morris, Tom Poleman, Island/Safehouse/Hollywood's Demi Lovato and John Sykes.

Capitol superstar Niall Horan confers with iHeart's conjoined execs John Sykes and Tom Poleman about the breaking of the fast. "I'm no expert," Niall urged, "but I'd steer away from the pulled-pork sandwiches." Later, 3,941 One Direction fans stole Poleman's pants.

Valory/BMLG's Thomas Rhett celebrates his #1 album Vegas-style, shortly before BMLG's Mike Rittberg accidentally atoned for a bunch of stuff ahead of schedule. Seen resolving to go on a media fast involving us are (l-r) Valory's George Briner, iHeart's Rod Phillips, John Sykes and Tom Poleman, BMLG chief Scott Borchetta, Rhett, iHeart's Bob Pittman and Bobby Bones, G Major's Virginia Davis and Rittberg.

"Tell me, rabbi," iHeart's Tom Poleman implores EDM giant David Guetta, "how may I be written in the Book of Life for this year?" "Tom, I'm not a rabbi, and you're not Jewish," Guetta replied. "I'm just covering my bases before bonus time," Poleman said.

"I just got this totally adorbs puppy from the pet-adoption tent in the iHeart Village," exclaims RECORDS star Noah Cyrus. Noted John Sykes, "I just adopted this darling promo guy, John Strazza. He makes the cutest sounds when you scratch his belly."

"I'm a huge fan of your music," Columbia's Harry Styles enthuses to Mercury Nashville's Chris Stapleton. "Likewise," Stapleton replied. "And that jacket reminds me of what everything looked like one time after I toked this blunt on Willie's tour bus." Later, the two switched outfits and successfully impersonated each other for the rest of the day.